From Nobody to Somebody
All my life I have been told that I'm never going to amount to be anything. In fact, I have been called a failure by most people that I know, especially those I considered to be closest to me. At this time in my life I was a failure. I just kept hanging with the wrong crowd; kept getting further and further away from who I truly was. This is the cold, hard truth. I was actually a nobody.
As a teen, people would bully and laugh at me because of where I came from and this drove me to make decisions I would not have normally made. Truly, the choices I made really showed how naive and arrogant I was. But still, I fell victim and was traumatized.
It was exceptionally interesting why I wanted to become a nutritionist, because I was definitely one of the least healthiest person known to man. I never cared about what I ate, hardly drank water, and never exercised. I ate rough, sometimes not eating for days, other times, I found myself gouging on multiple plates of food. Of course, this is because I didn't know if the food I had in front of me was going to be my last meal. I drank so much alcohol and energy drinks, and even though my photos showed me smiling, I was miserable out there in the streets, dressing like a clown, trying to survive so young.
At age 17, I fell ill with "graves' disease," an autoimmune disease that destroys thyroid cells. At age 23, I fell ill with mycoplasma pneumonia, which is a form of bacterial pneumonia related to cold agglutinin disease, an organism that destroys red blood cells. This time, I ended up in the hospital for 3 weeks, and subsequently had emergency surgery performed, and then years later radiation therapy. Nothing seemed to work. This point was when I had finally failed enough.
When You’re at Your Lowest Point... Everything becomes crystal CLEAR!
I’d been living a divided life.
I was following systems that made no sense. I was listening to people who were leading me further into the abyss. Moreover, I experienced immense suffering.
But, no one was responsible for any of this except ME.
I was, as they say, “As bad as they get,” and I certainly was... “the woman to blame.”